What Love Feels Like
by silentskeptics
Summary: Summary inside.Romance.Please read and review.Enjoy! a Rocket to the Moon,Nick Santino are in this story.If you've never listened to them,please do!he is amazing!
1. California Dreaming

**Author's Note **

**Oh my, God, I haven't written a Fan Fiction in FOREVER. Well I randomly got an idea so I figured I'd write it. I'm not sure if you'll like it because I usually try to include some action but this doesn't really. It's just a romance. But please give it a chance. Thanks! **

**Summary- a story about a couple's first meet, date, etc. Inspired by the movie 500 Days of Summer (sort of haha).**

**Disclaimer- I DO NOT own Nick Santino/a Rocket to the Moon or the songs by them that are mentioned throughout the story, or Abercrombie and Fitch (and I'm sorry if by saying all the snobs in the main character's school wear it is offensive to anyone), or "California Dreaming". However, the story line and other characters are of my own creation. Enjoy! **

_The California Gold Rush is so boring, _I think. I slouch farther in my desk as Mr. Burton survey's the room with his beady eyes, searching for another victim.

"Sierra Bogan!" he booms. "Why don't _you_ present your project next?"

The girl mumbles a curse under her breath and carries a large poster to the front of the class. It's mediocre, covered with clumps of yellow paper to represent gold. I feel rude for admitting it, but it made me feel more confident about my poster.

Sierra launches into her presentation and I zone out. I can relax until Mr. Burton is ready to call on another person. Unfortunately, her presentation wasn't as long as I had hoped.

"Okay, you may sit." Burton crosses her name off of his clipboard. "That was our twelfth poster, guys. I told you to be creative with this!"

Sierra hangs her head guiltily and Mr. Burton moves on.

"Nick Santino? You're up."

I don't recognize the name…Was there really a Nick Santino in this class? I try to remember if I'd seen him before as he walks from the back corner to the front. Oh, that's right! He's in a lot of my classes; I had just never known his name.

He's a little on the scrawny side with a wide nose. His hair is a fiery orange and his skin is pale. He's not ugly, just different than all the other boys at this school. Every other boy her is a snob who only shops at Abercrombie and Fitch and is on the football team. He seems to be kind of a loner. He's carrying a beautiful guitar and I wonder what in the world his project is. He sits on a stool Burton brings him and as he sits atop it, I see something under his sleeve. A tattoo? My eyebrows furrow. Why did a boy like him move here?

"Finally," Burton exclaims, "something interesting."

Nick looks at the floor, embarrassed. He clears his throat. He does a few fast scales and arpeggios that leave the class memorized. He clears his throat again. His face looks a little flushed. I see his mouth move mutely, counting down.

Then he begins to sing in a soft, velvet voice. He's singing "California Dreaming" by the Mama's and the Papa's but changes the lyrics around a little. I glance around at my peers and they are all opened mouth and in a trance, right along with me. I am jealous. I've always thought guitar was amazing and singing was even better; this boy could do both.

His song is over much too fast. He starts to recap some of the major facts of the Gold Rush. Then, he's walking to the back of the room again. Everyone cheers loudly and his face gets a little redder. I peek back and smile at him; he stares at me when our eyes meet. I turn back around. Just because you're extremely talented doesn't mean you can't be odd too…

"Well done, Nick. Well done!" Burton cheers along with the class. Then he's onto the next presentation. No one can top Nick's. "Hmmm, Ella Morrison. Go."

Well, crap.

****

After class, my friend Abby and I approach Nick.

"Hey nice job," I say as Abby just stares at the boy. It seems like she's scared of him.

"Thanks, you too," he says and I'm surprised that his talking voice sounds a lot like his singing voice. Soft.

I make a face. "Hell, no, all I had was a power point. Nothing exciting, like yours."

"Well, you didn't have a poster at least." He looks at Abby who is clutching her poster to her body. "No offense."

"None taken," she mutters. She's staring at his upper arm and I'm guessing she sees the tiny bit of tattoo that's showing. Abby's shy like that and, in this stuck-up town, she probably has never seen anyone like him. "I have to go to class. See you at lunch, Ella."

"So you're Ella? Hey, I'm Nick." He smiles.

"Yeah, I know." I laugh, the kind that's back in your throat where you don't open your mouth at all. We head for the hallway and walk side-by-side. People stare as they see me with him. I bite my lip. "So…you're extremely lucky. You can sing and play guitar. That's awesome. I've always wanted to try."

"It's really fun. You should try. I'd teach you if you wanted."

"Oh, um, thanks." I look at my shoes.

"Well, I've gotta head on so I'll see you in science."

"Oh, okay, yeah, bye." I sputter like an idiot. I'm frozen to my spot. So he realized that we had a lot of classes together, too.

He walks off, guitar slung on his back, and I swear that he winked at me.

He sits next to me in all of the classes we have together today. And by lunch, I'm about sick of this boy.


	2. Cute

I take my tray and sit at my usual table, surrounded by my friends Abby, Leo, David, and Mae. There's one open seat, where Rebecca used to sit but she, sadly, moved to Maine. I still miss her and our table just isn't the same without her.

I munch on a French fry as the others chat about their days. Leo talks about how he scored an A on his Calculus test. Mae talks about how she got into a fight during gym. David talks about something hilarious that happened during homeroom. That's all I catch. It's boring. This is what happens every week, nothing new.

Abby starts talking about History, about presenting our projects. Then she talks about Nick.

"Wait, Nick Santino? The new guy?" asked Leo. "I think he's bad news. He's got tattoos! I heard he got expelled from his old school."

Abby's eyes get wide. "Really? Whoa. Well, Ella was talking to him in the hallway after class."

I feel four pairs of eyes turn on me. I swallow a lump of hot French fry. "What?" I ask.

"How did it go?" Mae asks.

"…Fine. He seems nice. Actually too nice. He's been following me around all day! Ugh."

"He probably likes you," says David.

I stick out my tongue at him. "Shut up, Dave. This is my break from him. Do we have to keep talking about him?"

"Oh my, God, look! There's your boyfriend now!" shouts Leo.

"I said shut up, guys." My eyes widen as Leo jumps up and jogs over to him. I put my head in my hands as he points over to our table. "Shit…" When I look up again, Nick is sitting across from me.

"Hey," he says to me.

"Hi," I say mildly and continue to eat.

For the next twenty minutes, my friends interrogate him about everything. He was in a band but since he moved, they had to break up. He wasn't expelled, his dad just transferred here. He's originally from Massachusetts. Yes he does have tattoos: on his arm and on his chest. That's all I caught from the conversation because I was trying to avert my eyes and look uninterested, hoping he'd leave me alone if I stopped talking to him. I feel other tables staring at ours. Nick seems happy to have people to talk to, though. He smiles and jokes with everyone else.

He gets up to throw his trash away and then take his tray back to the kitchen. I groan loudly.

"Leo…I hate you so much," I say. It doesn't bother him. He just smiles sarcastically.

"If he's bothering you so much, why don't you tell him to leave you alone?" asks Abby.

"I don't know if I have the heart to do that."

"I'll do it!" Mae interjects. And before I know it she's running up to him.

"Wait!" I call after her but she can't hear me in the buzzing lunch room.

She's talking to him, moving her hands. I have no idea what she's telling him. She's probably wording it all wrong. He's going to think I'm such a jerk.

He looks over at me, his eyes apologetic. "Sorry," he mouths.

I groan again as Mae walks back to the table. "Dammit," I say and run over to him as he's walking to another table. "Come here." I grab his arm and walk around all the tables as people watch us. I'm sick of everyone staring. I lead him into the hallway and around the corner, next to the stairs where no one can see us.

Nick's deep, brown eyes look lost and helpless. He nervously runs a hand through his unkempt hair. "Listen, I'm really sorry. I never meant to-"

"No, you listen. I don't know what Mae said to you but I'm guessing it made me sound like a jerk. I didn't even want her to tell you. I just feel like your following me around. I mean, it's cool that you want to be friends but I feel…I don't know."

"I understand. I'm sorry, again."

I pat his shoulder. "It's fine, Nick. It's okay. You're a really cute guy and you're talented, nice, funny, and smart. Anyone here would want to be friends with you. People need to stop judging you. And, you know, I think after this little problem, I think we could be good friends."

He pauses. His eyebrows furrow and then he smirks. "You said I'm cute."

"What?" My face flushes. "I said cool. I said cool. Not cute."

He cocks his head. "So I'm not cute?"

"No, I-" I'm sputtering again. My skin feels so hot.

"So…I am cute?" he asks.

"Would you stop that, Nick?" I ask, frustrated now.

"No," he laughs. "Admit it. You think I'm cute."

"You are so annoying. Stop bothering me."

"Say it." He gives me a knowing look.

He is attractive, I can't deny it. But I don't want to tell him that; there's no telling what he would do if I said he was. He'd probably go around telling everyone that I said that. _Ugh, what should I do?_

Whatever, I decide. It would get him off my back.

What I didn't know was that as soon as I opened my mouth, the truth would come pouring out.

"Fine, okay. I think you're cute, actually, gorgeous. Okay? But you have tattoos and you're like…I just don't think…I've never been attracted to someone like you before and it's weird for me. I hardly know you," I prattle, realizing what exactly I've said too late.

"So you _are_ attracted to me?" Nick asks.

"Yes, Nick. I am. But you're frustrating and annoying me. So just-"

Next thing I know, his hands are on either side of my face. They are soft and the fingertips are callused from guitar playing. He looks intently into my eyes, as if searching for something. My whole body is hyperaware of his touch, tingles spreading on my skin.

He leans down slowly to kind of give me a hint of what he's about to do. His lips barely brush mine and he pauses, looking at me expectantly. I just gaze back. He probably expects me to pull away and yell at him from doing that. But I'm jello in his arms. I hate to say it. He smells really good. How does this infuriating boy have me acting this way?

He grins because he knows he's got me right where he wants me. He presses his lips harder against mine and my hands instinctively wrap around his neck and pull him closer.

_WHAT ARE YOU DOING? _My mind screams at me. I can't pull away.

His fingers are running through my hair. He's smiling into the kiss. Then his arms slide down and I feel him touch my hip. That makes me jump backwards.

"I-I gotta go," I say, embarrassed. I feel my face turning red again. I dash up the stairs.

"See you later, Ella," he says but then his voice is lost in the shrill school bell.

As I quickly race to my locker, I feel something inside my pocket that wasn't there before. Maybe that's what Nick was doing, putting something in my pocket. That was all; why did I spazz out like that?

I reach into my pocket to see what it is…


	3. About Time

**Three weeks later…**

We stand in front of a small, brick building. I unconsciously twirl a strand of my dark, brown hair around my finger while looking down at the scribbled note Nick had slipped in my pocket. It reads:

_**Playing a show at 8:30 on Saturday, October 15 at The Attic Club on Perth Road. **_

_**Be there early if you can. Hope to see you there.**_

"Why are we here, Abby? You know he's just going to make a smart ass comment about how I came because I like him. He's been giving me weird looks ever since the incident…" I had ended up telling Abby about how Nick found out how I thought he was cute. I still haven't told her about the kiss yet.

"I have a good feeling about us coming…just trust me. Plus, this might be fun," she says, making her way towards the door.

I stop her just as her fingers brush the handle. I can hear music blaring from where I'm standing. "But the note says come at 8:30 and it's almost 9:00. What if we missed him already?"

"Well there's one way to find out." She yanks on my arm and swings the heavy door open.

The club is small, sweaty, and crowded. The room buzzes with talking and adrenaline. Abby is pulling me towards the front. I spot fiery orange hair underneath the lone spotlight. _Nick_. I can hear him saying something to someone backstage but the microphone doesn't register it. He turns around and faces the mike again.

"Alright, that was called Mr. Right. You wanna hear more?" he asks.

The crowd screams and Nick grins, making my stomach flop. Abby doesn't stop pulling me forward until we're directly in front. Nick is hesitating before his next song. He scans the crowd thoroughly. His eyes land on me and squint, trying to focus in the blaring spotlight.

He nods slowly and grins again. He mouths "Hey". I wave halfheartedly. He turns around to the drummer and bassist and tells them something but, again, I can't hear it.

He strums a few chords on his guitar and the drummer starts to play along followed by the bassist. "I want you to clap along!" Then he begins to sing in that velvet voice. I don't even hear the lyrics. But suddenly the hit me.

"She lives at night and sleeps all day; she'll dance and drink her life away but she doesn't know who I am.

"She gets what she wants and doesn't quit. She might as well get paid for it but she doesn't who I am and she doesn't give a damn.

"She doesn't kiss under raining clouds, only boys in the same crowd. Guess I'm outta luck now. Is it because of my long hair? Tattoos? Or the fact that I don't care what she thinks of me and that drives her crazy?

"I can see the love when I look into her eyes. If everyone could see what I see inside."

I freeze and my mouth drops. Abby is doing the exact same thing.

"I think he's singing about you!" Abby screams in my ear.

I nod. I spend the rest of the song trying to decide if I'm furious or flattered.

When Nick finishes the song, he waves and walks off the stage. Another musician comes on stage but Abby and I are already making our way to the bar up front. We sit on tall bar stools and a tall man with glossy, black hair and emerald eyes asks if we want anything. We politely decline.

"Should we go?" I ask over the music.

"I think we should wait for Nick to come. I don't think he'll be too long," Abby replies, leaning closer so it's easier to hear her.

She was right, within minutes Nick was standing before us.

"You came!" he screams joyfully. "Thanks, you guys. Listen, do you want to go get some dinner? I know a great place."

"No, I better head home," Abby says and I shoot her a confused look. "Great show. We got here late. I'm sorry but it was still good."

"Oh, uh, okay, and thanks!" He beams. He reminds me of a little kid. "Ready, Ella?"

"Sure." I stand up and he leads me outside into the chilly night air. We walk side-by-side for a short distance and turn into an old fashioned diner, complete with a neon sign. _Very authentic_, I laugh to myself.

It's almost empty in the restaurant. There's only two other couples in the building besides us. A stout woman leads us to a booth in the back and Nick slides in next to me, not even trying to be subtle. The booth is so small that I feel his leg against mine. The woman asks for our drink orders gruffly and leaves.

"So what did you think? Well what you heard of it at least?" he asks, giving the menu a cursory glance.

"It was really good. Sorry we were late."

"It's fine, you heard the best song. That's all that matters." He smiles devilishly.

"About that…was that-?"

"Yes," he says, reading my thoughts.

"Well, that's-."

"Interesting?"

"Very."

"Did you like it, though?"

"I think so."

He smiles crookedly and I feel the corners of my lips tug up. His brown eyes smolder. My stomach does flips again.

"Why do you keep doing this to me?" I ask, frustrated.

He tilts his head in confusion. "Doing what?"

"Pulling me in like this. I'm not supposed to be attracted to someone like you and you're not supposed to be attracted to me."

"What?" he exclaims. "How can I_ not_ be attracted to you? You have interests in music, which is important to me. You're nice enough to talk to me, the new kid, and then not yell at me when I was bugging you. You don't give into the stupid fads at school. You're smart and you're beautiful."

I turn red. His thumb brushes against my hot cheek. "Oh, and let's not forget how damn cute you are when you blush."

"You know," I say, trying to form coherent thoughts but it was hard with Nick flustering me like this, "I don't know why people act scared of you just because you're different than most people they meet at our school. You're actually sweet and caring and…oh my, God."

"Huh?"

"I-I do like you…in an 'I'm extremely attracted to you' kind of way. Not a 'I want to be your friend' kind of way."

His eyes go wide. "Really?" he asks. "You're not just kidding with me?"

"Why would I do that?"

"I don't know. It's just…I never thought you would actually, finally like me." He presses his lips into a thin line sheepishly.

"Like, you said before, how can I _not_ like you? I'm giving in now. I'm yours."

"Well it's about time."

Nick's leaning in. I can feel his weight shifting on my leg. He's moving painfully slow as if he's savoring the moment. I close my eyes so my other senses are richer. I feel his hot, sweet breath against my face. When our lips finally meet, it's different than before. Maybe it's because this time I was expecting it. Or maybe it's because I've accepted that I actually like him. He pulls me in closer and I feel that I'm right where I'm supposed to be.


	4. Unbeliveable

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh and in case you don't get why it keeps skipping ahead, I'm doing it to cover main parts in their relationship. And it's like 500 Days of Summer where they do that but my story is in order haha. Oh and reviews please :D **

**One year and four months later…**

I sit on the couch in the back of the club. I can hear Nick saying something into the microphone but I don't really listen. I'm too busy with studying for a huge Calculus test to pay attention. It would be easier to concentrate without the loud music but I always come to all of Nick's shows. I'm not going to miss one just because of some stupid test. The crowd screams about God knows what.

I stare at the extensive problem on the notes on my lap. My head hurts. Graduation is soon. I'm so stressed. I haven't gotten any acceptance letters yet. It's hard to believe that soon I'll be going to college and moving out. Nick and I haven't talked about it yet. I'm pretty sure he said something about going to whatever college I'm going to. I'm still on the fence about that. I don't want to limit him. He should go where he wants.

I'm scared that he'll ask me to move in with him. Not that I wouldn't like that but it would be a nerve-wracking experience. Doesn't that ruin couples sometimes? Being an adult sounds hard. What a joy senior year is. I rake a hand through my hair and take a deep breath. A strand falls in my eyes and I don't bother to move it.

Eventually, someone moves it for me and tucks it behind my ear. I feel a head rest against my shoulder. I already know who it is. He's showered and smells like cologne.

"You look stressed," Nick says.

"Yeah…just thinking about the future," I say.

"What about it?" He nuzzles against my neck.

"College, job, money, where I'm going to live, blah, blah, blah."

"About that last one," he begins. My heart skips a beat. But then he's interrupted by someone telling him how good he was.

"Hey, let's go out front. We can listen to the next act or we could go get some food," I say before he can start talking again.

"Sure." He kisses my neck and stands up.

I pack up my study material into my bag and sling it over my shoulder. Nick takes my hand and we walk out into the crowd. People yell at Nick as we walk by, saying how great he was. He nods and thanks them all. We stand at the bar as the man on stage talks about how he lives in a van and would appreciate if everyone would 'show their tips'. The crowd gasps, not realizing he had clearly said _tips, _not the other word. Nick and I burst out laughing.

A guy with white-blond hair approaches us, looming over us because he's so tall. "Nick!" he exclaims. "You comin' to Jared's party tonight?"

"Jared?" Nick asks. "Who's that?"

The guy fingers the gauges in his ears. "He's the drummer of the headlining band. He's having this huge party at his house for all the bands that played tonight. There's probably going to be some important people there. You guys were looking for a record label, right? You and your band should come."

"That's awesome! I'll be there. Can Ella come to?"

The guy looks down at me, biting his lip. "I don't think so. Jared wanted to keep it kind of private, just a party for the bands to chill together. Sorry." He frowns.

"Hmm," Nick says. He looks down at me. "Well, I'll have to turn your invitation down. Sorry, maybe another time."

"Oh," the guy gasps. "Okay, then. See you later, I guess."

"Why would you do that?" I ask, confused. "What if you had met someone from a record label there? That would have been huge! Why did you say no?"

"Because you couldn't come with me."

"So? I don't care. Go!"

His arm snakes around my waist. "I'm good right where I am."

I close my eyes and shake my head. I sigh but let it drop for now. I copy him and put my arm around his waist too. I feel something gnawing at me. Something's not right.

"Let's go," Nick says and leads me away.

Nick drives me home and even walks me to the door, just like he does every time he drops me off. He pushes me against the door, hands on either side of me so I can't leave yet. He kisses me hard.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" he asks after he pulls away.

"Yes," I say, unlocking the door and walking inside. "I'll see you later."

"Okay. I love you," he says.

I freeze. He's never said that before. Should I say it back?

"Love you too," I say with my back to him. I close the door and sprint to my room, feeling miserable for some reason. I crawl into bed.

I don't sleep much that night. I toss and turn, trying to figure out what's wrong.

Then it hits me.

And I know what I have to do now.

In the morning, I drag myself out of bed. There are dark circles under my eyes from my sleepless night. I throw on a pair of jeans and a white v-neck shirt with a purple sweatshirt. I walk past my parents closed door and out into the morning air. I climb into my car and speed over to Nick's house. My throat is thick and my heart is thudding in my chest.

Nick answers the door in only a t-shirt and his boxers. He rubs the sleep from his eyes. "You're here earlier than I expected," he says groggily.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. I just…"

"It's fine; I don't care. Come in." He takes my hand and we go to his room. His parents aren't here, probably running an errand of some kind. Good.

Nick lies on his bed, on top of the overturned covers. I sit next to him, not even bothering to kick off my shoes, feeling uncomfortable.

"You still look stressed," he says, patting my leg. "What's wrong?"

I take a shaky breath and look at my trembling hands. My mouth opens but all that comes out is a squeak. Tears escape from the corners of my eyes. Nick looks up at me with a surprised look on his face. He tightly holds my hands as if trying to stop them from shaking.

"Baby, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" When I don't answer, he gets worried. "Did something happen? Ella, I need to know. Please."

I pull my hands away and cover my face. I shake my head. I try to catch my breath but it seems to escape me every time so all that comes out are sharp gasps. I can't believe I'm actually going to go through with this. I have to.

"I-I-I can't t-take this," I sputter.

"Take what?" he asks anxiously. He sits up and grips me by the shoulders. "Why are you so upset?" he asks gently.

"Nick…I think we should s-stop."

"Stop what? I'm confused."

"You know what I'm talking about," I say hopelessly. I can't control my sobbing.

He pauses and then his eyes widen again. His face flushes. "But why?" he asks loudly. "What did I do?"

"Nothing…" I almost tell him but decide he wouldn't understand. "I can't tell you. I'm sorry, for everything. You'll find someone better." I move to leave. He stops me.

"I don't understand what I did wrong!"

"Nothing, Nick. You did nothing wrong." I run out of the room and out the front door. I speed home and park in the driveway. I lay my head on the steering wheel and cry some more. Crying until there are no tears left.

Nick will be better off without me.


	5. Life of the Party

**Seven months later…**

I stand near a small table decorated with drink bottles and food in Mae's family room. In my hand is a plastic, red cup full of Coke. It's been three months since we've graduated. A huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders but there's only more stress to come. College would be coming soon.

It was cool that Mae was having this party though. I hadn't seen a lot of my friends since graduation. Not that three months was a long time but still…

"So who's all coming?" Abby asks Mae.

"Everyone." Mae smiles devilishly. "I invited as many people as I could and told them to invite anyone they wanted."

"This should be fun," Abby says. "And your parents aren't home so that will make it better."

"Yeah and I've got alcohol too. This should be one wild night."

"Mae, isn't that illegal since we're not 21 yet?" I ask. I give her a confused look.

"Hey, we're all out of high school. We're allowed to celebrate."

I shrug and drop it. Who cares? I wanted to have a good time and I wasn't going to let anything stop it.

Soon, Mae's house was filling up with people, the music was gradually getting louder, and the lights were getting dimmer. Abby and I danced and screamed the lyrics to the songs like idiots. It seemed like Mae knew a lot of perverts though because so many guys tried to come up to use and grind. We just moved to another spot any time it happened.

We both get sweaty from all the dancing and the amount of people in such a small space. It's like this in every room, though. I loop my arm around my best friend's and we skip over to the drink table again.

I fill up a cup with ice cold water as Abby and I sing the next song. It's that new song that's majorly overplayed on the radio: Tik Tok by Ke$ha.

"Don't stop; make it pop, DJ blow my speakers up. Tonight, imma fight 'till we see the sunlight. Tick, tock on the clock but the party don't stop, no."

I turn around and see him there, standing before me. It's very theatrical as the song turns slow for a moment. His mouth opens and I bolt back into the crowd.

Abby jogs up to me, with the cup of water I had left at the table in hand. She hands it to me and asks, "What's wrong?"

"Nick is here," I say and she nods sympathetically. A thought comes to my head and I fight with myself for a moment. Then I decide: _who gives a shit?_ I chug my water and return to the drink table. Abby watches me as I go.

Nick is still there. He watches me curiously as I take a new plastic cup and fill it full with beer. I've never had any kind of alcohol before. I take a sip and it burns. I shake my head and tell myself to keep going.

_With Nick here there's no way I'll be able to relax and have fun. You have to do this. It should help you loosen up, _I tell myself.

I chug the rest of the cup and my head is buzzing. It's not so bad once you get used to it. I refill but don't chug it this time. I slowly nurse it and marvel in how I feel. I feel like dancing some more. I look over at Nick who is watching me with a horrified expression. I wiggle my fingers at him and prance away.

"What the hell are you doing?" Abby asks, peering into my cup.

"It's fun," I say giddily. "Try it!"

**NICK'S P.O.V.**

I remind myself to never let Ella get a hold of alcohol again. She's danced and grinded with every guy at the party. Her eyes are wild and her hair is tousled from flipping her hair around. She's covered in sweat. _Besides the stench of beer, she looks extremely sexy_, I think as she shakes her hips. I shake the thought away. She broke up with me. I have to remember that. She wants nothing to do with me.

I see her look off, her eyes glazed. She rubs her forehead like she's in pain. A guy grabs her by the hand and he leads her towards the stairs. She's stumbling with a faint smile on her face.

Feeling that something strange was happening, I follow. If anyone asks, I'm looking for the bathroom. I trail at a healthy distant so they don't think I'm stalking them or something.

He takes her into one of the bedrooms and kicks the door closed. Luckily, he didn't kick it hard enough so there was still a crack where I could see inside.

Ella falls onto the bed. Her eyes are closed and her face is blank. The guy crawls onto the bed and straddles her. His lips crash against hers as I watch disgusted. He yanks at her top; Ella sits there motionless, making it harder for the guy. In a few moments, she's laying there in her bra.

I burst through the door. "Get off of her, you douche bag."

"What the hell, dude? Can we have some privacy?" he screams.

"She's passed out for God's sake. You're a perv. Get out of my face."

"Oh and what's a scrawny-ass kid like you going to do to me?"

I glare at him. He stares back for a moment and then rolls his eyes. "Whatever." He gets up, throws Ella's shirt back on the bed, and goes back downstairs.

I bolt over to her and softly shake her. "Ella, Ella, wake up."

Her ocean blue eyes flutter but don't open. "Nick," she breathes. Her head fights to rise but she collapses. I slide her shirt back over her head and scoop her up in my arms.

I slowly carry her downstairs and out into the humid air. I clumsily set her in the passenger side of my beat-up car and get into my seat. I drive fast. The street lights above cast shadows on her face that only make her look sick. I silently pray as we drive that she's okay, even if she did break up with me.

**ELLA'S P.O.V.**

I'm swimming in darkness. My eyes fight to open. It's so hard. I'm laying on something soft. The blanket wrapped around me smells familiar. It's dark. Where am I?

I try to remember what happened last. My head is pounding and I feel nauseous. Hangover. Maybe I can sleep it off. I'm not in the mood to get up. I feel like sleeping forever.

I hear a rhythmic clicking sound coming from a few feet away from me. It's kind of soothing. I focus on that, instead of my need to vomit. Within minutes, or maybe hours, I'm back asleep.


	6. I Love You

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: First of all, a correction. I accidently put that Nick's eyes were brown when they are actually more of a blue-green color haha. So, yeah, I'll put the correct color from now on. Secondly, I MIGHT GET TO MEET NICK AND THE REST OF ARTTM IN THREE DAYS!!! YAY! I hope it all works out and I do get to meet them! Now on with the story!**

Finally, the throbbing in my skull has gone away a little and I open my eyes. It's still dark. The red analog clock next to me reads 1:00 am. The sheets enveloping me are warm and navy blue. I know exactly where I am. Memories of seven months ago flood in but I'm not in the mood to be upset. Plus, he's not even in the room.

I spot a tray adorned with crackers and a cup of water next to me. My stomach gurgles and I realize that I'm actually really hungry. I slowly nibble on the crackers because I'm not sure if my stomach is any better. When I decide that I'm not going to be sick, I shove about three crackers in my mouth. Just then the door opens. _Wonderful_, _perfect timing,_ I think.

Nick peeks his head in and looks around anxiously. "Good, you're awake."

I swallow the lump of salty crackers. "Yeah," I mumble.

He runs a hand through his hair nervously and stands in the door way awkwardly. Then he walks to his desk across the room from me and sits in the chair.

"How do you feel?"

"Okay," I say. "Thanks for-uh- helping me. You didn't have to." I sip at the water.

"I wanted to, though." There's an odd look in his eyes, like he's hiding something from me. "Even if you didn't want me to… I'm sorry."

I sigh heavily. "Come on, Nick, it's not like that at all. I don't hate you or anything."

He gnaws on his lip. He looks very tired but still the same old Nick. A pang of sadness hits me. I do miss him but he's better off.

"Did I do anything stupid while I was drunk?" I decide to ask to lighten the conversation.

"Lot's of dancing," he says mildly. "And um…never mind."

"What?"

"Well, it was nothing _you _did but something someone tried to do to you…I'd rather not talk about it."

He's not going to tell me. It must have been really bad. I decide to wait until later to ask again. "Thanks again, I owe you one."

He smiles feebly. "Can you tell me something then?"

"Sure, whatever."

"Why did you break up with me." When I open my mouth to object, he silences me. "You said you owe me one." His brown eyes plead with me and I feel myself giving in. "Please."

I take another sip of water, hesitating. "Remember the last show of yours I went to and that guy that asked you to go to the party?"

"You mean Andrew? Yeah, I remember."

"And remember how you wanted to go to the same college as me so we didn't have to split up?"

"Yeah," he says and his face lights up, thinking he understands, "wait, did you not want me to go to the same college as you?"

"Not exactly, what I mean is that I feel like I was always holding you back and that's the last thing I wanted to ever do. You're a musician. You're _supposed _to go to parties every night and have a wild time. You're _supposed_ to go to a college specializing in music or even take an internet course so you can tour. I never wanted you to think you couldn't tour because you didn't want to leave me alone or feel the need to drag me along. I was tired of holding you down. I want you to live a happy life and meet some musician girl to date so it's not such a hassle for you." I let out a deep breath and finger the covers, watching as I twisted the fabric around my thumb.

I hear him stand up and crawl into the bed next to me. "Why in the world would you _ever_ think you were tying me down? What if I wanted you to tie me down?" He pauses and then smirks. "Okay, sorry, that came out sounding kinky."

I can't help but grin.

"Would you be upset if I told you that after you broke up with me, I did what you apparently think all musicians need to do?"

"No, that's what I wanted."

I smile uncertainly. I'm still not sure about this. Nick ends the conversation, however, by pulling me closer until I'm sitting with my back against his chest and his thighs framing my hips. I rest my head on his shoulder and turn it at an angle at which I can gaze up at him.

He hasn't changed one bit. His hair is still disheveled and a blazing orange shade, his eyes a lustrous brown and thoughtful, his skin fair. He's still gangly but that's just the way I like him. I breathe him in. I've missed him so much. I can see a small part of the tattoo on his chest through his shirt. I trace the cursive letter with my finger tip. _All you need is love._

In my peripherals I see Nick smile crookedly. He carefully runs his fingers through my long, brunette hair, tangled from my night of drunken dancing and restless sleeping. Soon his fingers no longer get caught on snags. They glide freely through my hair.

"Thanks," I say with a small laugh.

He chuckles then presses his lips to the top of my head. "You're welcome," he murmurs into my hair.

We sit together quietly, seeming like eternity. But it's fine with me; I can sit here forever. I hear Nick start to hum, deep in his throat. Slowly, his volume builds. His voice leaves me mesmerized.

"_My eyes are no good, blind without her  
The way she moves I never doubt her  
When she talks she somehow creeps into my dreams  
She's a doll, catch, a winner  
I'm in love and no beginner  
Could ever grasp or understand just what she means_

_Baby, baby blue eyes  
Stay with me by my side  
'til the morning, through the night  
Well baby, stand here holding my sides  
Close your baby blue eyes  
Every moment feels right  
And I may feel like a fool  
But I'm the only one dancing with you  
Whoa oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh , oh oh_

_I drive her home when she can't stand  
I like to think I'm a better man  
For not letting her do what she's been known to do  
She wears heels and she always falls  
I let her think she's a know it all  
But whatever she does wrong, it seems so right  
My eyes don't believe her, but my heart swears by her_

_Baby, baby blue eyes  
Stay with me by my side  
'til the morning, through the night  
(can't get you out of my mind)  
Well baby, stand here holding my sides  
Close your baby blue eyes  
Every moment feels right  
And I may feel like a fool  
But I'm the only one dancing with you  
Whoa oh oh, oh oh oh oh oh, oh oh oh , oh oh  
Cant get you out of my mind_

_I swear I've been there  
I swear I've done that  
I'll do whatever it takes just to see those_

_Baby, baby blue eyes  
Stay with me by my side  
'til the morning, through the night  
(can't get you out of my mind)  
Well baby, stand here holding my sides  
Close your baby blue eyes  
Ever moment feels right  
And I may feel like a fool  
But I'm the only one dancing with those_

_Baby, baby blue eyes  
Stay with me by my side  
'til the morning, through the night  
(can't get you out of my mind)  
Well baby, stand here holding my sides  
While closing your baby blue eyes  
Ever moment feels right_

_My eyes are no good, blind without her  
The way she moves I never doubt her  
When she talks she somehow creeps into my dreams."_

My hands are trembling slightly. "T-that was beautiful."

"Thanks," he whispers. "You're a good inspiration. I've got more if you want to read them some time."

"Of course," I say as Nick brushes my hair off my shoulder and onto the other. My head spins as he leans down and kisses my neck.

My mind says this isn't the time, we still need to talk this over, but my heart says to keep going. It beats furiously. Nick's lips rest on my pulse a moment before moving to my jaw line. He nibbles playfully on the skin. I turn my head so our lips meet. He kisses me like I'm fragile, like I'll turn to dust under his touch. A thought pops into my head; this must have been what he felt like seven months ago, like I'd disappeared like dust in the wind. One minute I had been with him and the next I was gone.

A pang of regret hits me hard and I maneuver myself to face Nick but without breaking our kiss. He must have hated me. I bet he's got plenty of songs about those months. I must have crushed him.

I'm thinking too much, I decide. I finally notice that the whole time I was thinking, I was pressing myself hard into Nick's chest. My hands are wrapped around the collar of his shirt harshly. He doesn't seem to mind, though. His breath sounds ragged. Still, I loosen up a little.

He catches my bottom lip in both of his and pulls back slightly. My mouth parts responsively and his tongue darts in, tasting and dancing with mine erotically.

My fingers fight with the buttons on his shirt. It takes me a while because I'm shaking and Nick is making thinking an extremely hard task. Eventually, the shirt slides off. He shudders as my fingers venture over his muscled chest.

Now his fingers, callused from his guitar, are gliding up my back. There's an odd hollow sensation in my stomach as my v-neck is lifted over my head. I finger his leather belt and he kicks his jeans to the floor as soon as I've loosened it. Then he works on mine.

My face gets hot, hot enough for Nick to feel. Lying here in only my bra and underwear, with  
Nick's mouth on mine, and the hard lump in the front of his boxers pressing against my thigh, I realize I can't do it.

I detach myself from his gold and flop onto the mattress. I turn on my side to hide my ashamed face.

"Babe, what's wrong?" Nick asks, resting a hand lightly on my shoulder.

"I can't do it, Nick. I-I'm not ready…"I whisper.

He flips me around to face him. "Don't be embarrassed," he says while gazing at me intently. "Truthfully, I wasn't sure if I was ready either."

I cuddle against his chest and drape my arm over his thin frame. He instinctively hugs me tightly to him.

"That makes me feel better," I mumble against his skin. He doesn't respond, just picks up on stroking my hair.

That's what I like about being with Nick: I have a say in our relationship. He would never make me do something I didn't want to do.

I gasp at my revelation.

Nick freezes. "What is it?"

"I understand now." Nick patiently waits for me to explain. "I was never holding you down because you chose to do the things you did. You wanted to be with me, you wanted to go to my college."

Nick laughs; I feel his body shake. "Isn't that what I've been telling you?"

I blush again. "Well, I wasn't certain until now."

He caresses my cheek like he always does when I blush. "I understand."

We lay there, holding each other. I listen to Nick's heart beat as I test out the words in my mind.

"Nick?"

"Yes?"

I take a deep breath. "I'm sorry about all of this." I wave my hand around to indicate what I mean.

"Don't worry about it. It's all said and done."

"I love you…so much, more than anything."

"I love you too. Now that you've said that, do you promise to not come over early tomorrow and break up with me again?" I hear the smile in his voice.

"No, not this time. Plus, I planned on staying here anyway."

He looks down at me and I wink. He beams brightly. I sigh dreamily and drift off to sleep in his arms.

I'm pretty sure that this is what loves feels like.

**ANOTHER NOTE: haha just another update, I was originally going to write a few more chapters for this story but I think I'm going to end it here FOR NOW. I'm going to wait and see if there's enough demand for more chapters cause I think it could end here or I could add more, either way. So until then, I'm going to work on another new FF. It's a vampire one (sorry if you're one of those people who is sick of vampires, I must admit I sort of am) but this one is going to be good. It's got a lot more action in it than this one. It's a Family Force 5 fan fiction. Hahaha wait an interesting combination. Anyway, I'm probably going to be posting it soon so keep an eye out for it! Thanks! 3 **


End file.
